Scared to be Alone

Last Night I begged for him to take me back. I begged and cried and pleaded for him to take me back.  I don't know if I really want him back but I want B to be happy. He said he didn't love me anymore and that he can't be married to me.  My life choices hve not been great and I am the one who suffers and deals with the pain. I am 30 years old and have a ton of life to live.  I just want it to be better than before!