Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Grey Skies

I feel completely defeated! I feel overwhelmed! No One understands my depression and my sadness. I feel alone and lost in a world that is moving at such a fast pace. I struggle everyday to even get out of bed and face the day. A new day scares me! I can't sleep at night because I know I will eventually have to wake up. My anxiety becomes so overwhelming and I want to completely shut down! I just wish they understood how I feel because it hurts so bad. I have an internal struggle daily! I just want to escape the pain!

When you have depression, it's more than feeling sad.......It is intense feelings of sadness and other symptoms, like losing interest in things you enjoy, may last for a while. Depression is a medical illness, not a sign of weakness.

Depression is deep, depression is the deepest kind of sadness, a feeling that is always living in me. Depression is emptiness, something you always feel with depression, like you have nothing left of yourself, everything about you is empty. Depression is pain, the worst physical and emotional pain there is.

I blamed myself for all of my mistakes and misfortunes. I never thought lonliness could create such pain within me but it does.

I've slept and cried days away . Broken, lost, hurt, and angry have stuck to me for a long time. I wanted it to go away and this is was it. I haven't been a good person but I haven't been a bad person either. I have my regrets in this life and they will be with me forever

How bad I wanted to be something and all I end up is being a failure and a dissapointment in people's lives...