The D word!

Well,  I know it has been a long time since I have written but, I am just now able to feel like I say the things I want to say without fear. I am now DIVORCED! I never thought I would be one of those people that had to use that word. I am and I try not to and the words Divorce and my Ex- husband are the hardest words I have ever had to say. I don't believe in divorce and I am sad that I allowed it to get here but it is what it is. It just makes me sad that Michael gave up so easily.  I know it wasn't easy and things weren't perfect but lord I loved him more than he will ever know I guess. I feel ashamed and embarrassed but he has moved on with his life and he seems happy and thats good but I wish we could have been happy together. I will never be able to erase all of the little things that made us Michael and Lynsey and well we will never be that again. My heart is breaking a little more while I am typing and I wonder if I will ever get past this. I loved that man!